Pinter


            Masio bengine wis nonton kembang api nang mburi omah karo bapak emake, Tomin sing durung trimo. Arek lanang iku njaluk mlaku-mlaku isuke. Males dijak mlaku-mlaku nang mall sing mesti rame Diman milih nggowo anak bojone nang bonbin. Awale Tomin ora gelem, emake yo melu ora gelem polahe loro-lorone wis mikir kate ngeret Diman, cek iso tuku-tuku. Mari dikei alasan lek mall rawan ancaman bom, anak bojone iku akhire gelem.

            Mudun nang terminal Joyoboyo, wong  telu iku mlaku nang bonbin. Libur tahun baru dalanan liya ora patio rame ning dalan sing arep nang bonbin rame. Lagek enak-enak mlaku, moro-moro ono wong lanang nyeluk Diman. Wong lanang sing lagek karo wong wedok ayu iku ketok bingung karo nunjuk-nunjuk peta nang tangane. Bingung ora ngerti basane, Diman mung plonga-plongo.

            “We want to go to Suramadu Bridge, sir, could you tell us which way to go?” takone wong lanang sing tibake bule iku.

            “Omong opo wong iki, gak ngerti aku,” omonge Diman karo sik mlongo.

            “Bule pak, boso inggris iku,” saute Tomin.

            “Lha ngomonge pating pecotot ngunu. Koen lak diajari ta nang sekolahan, kono ngomongo,” omonge Diman nang anake.

            “Suramadu Bridge, Madura…” balene bulene.

            “Oalah kate nang Suramadu iku pak,” omonge Wiji.

            Wiji sing mau mung meneng ae akhire maju, nyedeki bule. Masio ora lancar wong wedok iku paham maksude lan iso ngarahno bule loro sing bingung kate nang Jembatan Suramadu iku.

            “Ouh thank you, thank you, mam,” omonge bule iku karo manthuk-manthuk.

            “You’re welcome,” saure Wiji karo mesem.

            Ngerti mak’e iso omong-omongan karo bule, Tomin melu seneng. Arek lanang iku ora ngiro lek mak’e pinter boso inggris. Diman nang sandinge meneng ae karo garuk-garuk gundul.

            “Mak, njaluk poto mak, ayo mak,” omonge Tomin.

            “Ho oh mak, mumpung koen iso ngomong,” Diman melu-melu ngomong.

            “Lha biasane opo aku gak tau ngomong? Ngisin-ngisini ae, norak,” saure Wiji karo sok ora butuh.

            Bule loro sing marem mari dikei ngerti arah nang Suramadu sing durung ngaleh. Wong loro sing keringete ndrodos iku istirahat karo ngombe banyu bekale. Dirayu-rayu anake, Wiji akhire nyedeki bule karo iku maneh.

            “Excuse me, sir, my monkey want your picture,” omonge Wiji karo ngangkat tangane, ngode njaluk poto.

            “Your monkey?” takone bule sing wedok karo bingung.

            “Yes, this is my monkey. Picture with you…two,” omonge Wiji maneh, saiki karo nunjuk anake.

            “Hahahaha, you’re joking. He’s a lot cuter than monkeys,” jare bule wedok karo ngguyu.

            Wiji mesem. Wong wedok iku ora mung seneng ning yo bangga. Anak bojone sing umek njaluk poto langsung njejeri bule loro iku. Gantian wong telu iku akhire poto-poto. Mari poto bule loro iku pamit. Wiji karo anak bojone nerusno mlaku nang bonbin. Nang ndalan Tomin sik ora percoyo lek mak’e tibake pinter. Arek lanang iku terus ae mesam-mesem.

            “Mak, sampeyan kok iso ngomong inggris? Pinter sampeyan mak,” omonge Tomin.

            “Lah, kaet ngerti ta koen? Kandani pak anakmu iku, ngene-ngene makmu iki juara,” omonge Wiji karo ngetungno jempole.

            “Hewes-hewes koyok asli mak, lambene yo merot-merot ngunu, podho,” omonge Tomin maneh.

            “Lah yo kudu no, lek lambene gak melu merot ngko ngomonge gak iso podho, gak jelas.”

            Tomin manthuk-manthuk. Arek lanang iku mlaku karo nyekeli mak’e, seneng, bangga. Opo maneh mau pas mak’e omong-omongan karo bule akeh wong sing ndelok.

            “Sampeyan biyen blajar nang ndi mak? Jare gak sekolah?” takone Tomin.

            “Aku biyen kan pas sik prawan, gurung rabi karo pakmu tau nang luar negeri.”

            “Ha, nang luar negeri mak? Nang ndi mak? Lapo?” takone Tomin.

            “Lapo, yo kerjo. Nang Singapor, rong taun aku.”

            “Kerjo opo mak?” takone Tomin maneh.

            “TKW, opo maneh.”

            “Ouh…tapi sampeyan keren mak, suip! Wayahe sampeyan ngajar ae, wong ngomonge yo podho karo bule kok, persis. Yo gak pak?”

            “Ho oh,” saure Diman.

            Wiji mesem. Wong wedok iku bukane ora tau kepikiran kate kerjo ning sakjoke rabi karo Diman opo maneh nduwe anak Tomin akeh repote. Anak bojo siji ning pengawean ono ae. Lagian Diman yo wis cukup lek ngewei blonjo. Wiji kate ninggal Tomin kerjo yo ora tego, wedi lek anak-anake ngko lapo-lapo lek diramut wong liya.

            “Cuk, makku pinter tibake,” omonge Tomin sik ora percoyo.

            “Heh cangkemmu, malah misuh. Makane lek koen goblok ki aku yo mikir, nurun sopo koen wong pakmu yo pinter,” omonge Wiji.

            “Pak’e pinter opo mak?” takone Tomin.

            Wiji nyawang bojone karo mesam-mesem. Sing disawang melu mesem, isin.

            “Malah cengengesan dewe,” jare Tomin karo mrengut.

            Ndelok anake mrengut mergo ora disauri Wiji selot amba lek mesem. Wong wedok iku nggandeng tangane bojone karo terus mlaku ndisiki anake.

            “Bonbin, Lik!” omonge Wiji nang anake tanpa noleh nang mburi.

            “Padakno becak ae,” saure Tomin selot mecucu.

***

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